fuck.

i cried a little yesterday. i think my heart died too. these few days i have been fucking it all up. this fucking giddiness just wont fucking go away. i feels like a boat ride. like anyone fucking cares, they kept saying "OMG! ARE YOU PREGNANT!?" like FUCK NO. why should i fuck someone? i feel so fucked up. mayb im just exhausted mentally and physically. i dont really eat properly these few days anyway. ugh.

sometimes, i really wished i would just collapsed in front of them. i have lost my mind, officially.


i feel like everything i do this NEVER good enough for certain people. i really did my best. mayb that's what i thought? my best was not good enough. im not a confirm registered staff. im a failure if they doesnt confirm me next month. i dont feel like talking to any of the 'big people'. i just want to know if im good enough to be confirm. i feel like a fucking disappointment. i feel like im an attention-seeker. i fucking hate myself. why am i even still here? why the fuck am i still fucking here?




btw, when are they going to get the fuck out? not they, just him. fuck.

Labels: fuck, im sorry you had to read this

he ate my heart, then he ate my brain ♥