|
☮
20050709
11:44
From : Nur Asyikin Rashid Sent : Monday, July 04, 2005 11:47:33 AM To : rinna_oi@hotmail.com im crying again. i cant forget her words in the phone conversation. it was so harsh that i just couldnt believe it was rinna. she sounds as if everything is my fault. thanks band members. i know its my fault she have cuts on her hands. im also the cause that she failed her amaths paper. she didnt even spare a thought for my feelings. yea. im a blood sucker. i suck her blood. when she said that, i was feeling so hurt. the deep wound she gave me. she wants to give up on me. give up on everything. she dont want my love anymore. she made me promise not to talk or see her again. she wants me to give sheila a chance and be more closer to other people. but why cant she be straightforward and tell me that she dont want me as her godsis anymore? is it a need for all those harsh words? i must have hurt her so badly, didnt i? like how she described.. its like im strangling her and she have difficulty breathing because i hold her by the leash. i brought pain to her. i drag everything. whatever i do seems to be wrong. is it a mistake to ask for a sister's love? even if she doesnt wanna give me, why doesnt she allow me to be concern about her? and which person wouldnt love his or her family? if i hadnt love my family.. esp my mum.. i wouldnt have made a sacrifice to buy her medicines instead of mine. yea. everything is my fault. but what she said in one night.. which no other people had said to me.. really hurts me. im feeling so bloody hurt. and it just have to happen on the same day when my mum got operated. um. i can really feel my heart aching now. hey bloodsucker! why are you crying?! i thought you are heartless? yea. im the main cause of her sadness. me. me. me! this is wat she wrote in her small book. see how hurt she is because of ur words? he ate my heart, then he ate my brain ♥ |