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20050326
22:46
hEy you. rightnow. freakinghour. feltthatshewasthinkingofme. no! please. so. theincrediblystupidme. askedherwhatshewasdoing. soisaid. [ ihvthefeeling. youreupset. thinkingofme. imnotbueyhaobai. but. ihv thefeeling. ] freakme. headache. well. almost1+dayzididntgettomeetmymum. haiz. missedher. anywayz. iknowihvhurther. shejustdunwannasay. hereshesaid [ can we dun bring tis up anymore? i'm not upset wif u anymore.. ] whycarnihavethereasonwhyihurtyou? whatdididowrong? imsostupid. stop ! duneventrytocryriNna. stupid. imsodumb. haiz. splitingheadache. he ate my heart, then he ate my brain ♥
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22:25
hEy you. um. yea. wentformendaki. nothingmuch. tired. yesterdaydidsomeofthehomework. yea. finishedsome. um. tired. weak. goneforpracticeattoapayohsouthcc. yah. okiae. fine. went tohougangmallwithkel, shirleyand ChengHao. walkedandwalked. wonderedabouther. yea. imstupid. heardtheworddumb. yea. perfectwordthatdiscribeme. imsostupid. hurtpeople. stupid. hatemyself. haiz. imtired. tiredofliving. freakingheadache. sometimes. ihatemyself. myeldersis. naggedthewholeday. andkepttalking. onedaywishedtojustslamthedoorandlockmyselfin. thereshegoes. thereshestartstalking. mysecongeldersister. ah. money. money. everyday. calledandaskedformoney. ifnotmoney. angry. andquarrelwithmum. myyoungersis. sofreakingrude. ohyah. forgot. peoplesec1lehz. chairmanarh. bigfreakingpostxia. imsofreakingscared. ah. imshaking. freak. haiz. hatemyself. amiheretotorturepeople? orhurtthem? ihaterinna. he ate my heart, then he ate my brain ♥
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20050325
16:19
hEy you. um. well. um. okiae. myleftripcagehurts. um. shewasupsetwithme. ya. iknow. imselfish. lefther. andwentforband. imsoselfish. see. iwentforband. andlefther. imselfish. whatstheusecryingnow? imstupid. crynow. stupid. iknow. peoplehateme. ihatemyself. ihatebeingloved. makepeopleworry. onWed. ididntwanttogohome. iwanttostaysomewherethere. androt. andsleepthere. nevergohome. andneverhurtheragain. imsostupid. hurtpeopleanddidntevenknow. imsostupid. cryforwhat? sostupid. imsodumb. rinnastopcrying. myripcagestillhurts. sostupid. cryagain? btw. whyicry? imstupid. hurtheranddidntrealise. whyamihere? icouldstillrememberthelettershewroteme. sayingthatimadeadifferencetoherlife. where? allididwas. hurther. hurther. hurther. so. ifyouarereadingthis. ihurtyouagainright? iknow. imsorry. everysorryisaidalwaysreplyedwitha "you dun have to say sorry.." iknowyouarehurt. imsorry. imsostupid. ihatemyself. dontsay "rinna.. you say all this. you're hurting me more.." iknow. imsorry. imashit. hurtyoueveryday. forgiveme. slapmeifihurtyouagain. idundeservethe "you dun have to say sorry.." eachtimeisaysorrytoyou. he ate my heart, then he ate my brain ♥
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20050324
22:51
hEy you. uMm. todaycameearly. forband. sofun. buttired. almostfellasleepduringemathz. gosh. icarnsleepinclass. stillgotalotofworktodo. um. duringband, meandkelwastakenbythefatt. wahh. proxia. haiz. iwantlengtotakemeandkel. haiz. kindadisappointedthough. notcozoffatt. cozofmyplayingverybadlahh. goingtotoapayohsouthcconSat. forxtrasectionals. ithinkimcuminginmyschu. arh. umm. so tired. btw. thePElessonwasinteresting. runandrun. wahh. tiredxia. hungrytoo. atetwoslicesofbread andtwoslicesofcheese. fordinner. believeitanot. anddrankwater. haiz. dunwanttoeat. kindaannoyedaboutyesterday. kelspoiltimage. haiz. he ate my heart, then he ate my brain ♥
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20050320
22:06
hEy you. hMm. tmlgotschool. sian. gotproblemarh. haiz. alotofproblems. cutmyhairler. ihavebeenaskingmymum eversincemybday. haiz. tmlafterschool, willbegoingout. hmm. buysomethingwithKel. yea. hmm. carnthinkofsomethingtowriteon. die. tmlschool. guessimgonnaburnmidniteoil. haiz. haiz. he ate my heart, then he ate my brain ♥
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20050319
17:55
hEy you.. wahh. so manythingshappenxiathisweek. didntblogforquitesometime. whaha. yea. um. justnowthemornchattedwith KawaiiTimmii. haha. fromMontfort. metduringthexchangelastthurs. well. thexchangewasokiae. Kelsaidthatthe5/4barwasgood. bleahx. idinplayverywellarh. idunnolah. ionlythatimnotverygoodlar. hmm. gonefortuition. wasearly. blah-blah. study. duringtheenglishlesson. theWantalkedabouttheholidays. wah. whenitcomesaboutmusicorband. ibecamesorefreshed! talkedabouttheflute. wahh. ibroughtmyflutealong. soigotto "haolian" arh. peoplehaolianwithconfidence. butme. haiz. nohope. iwasshakinglikealeaf. sillyme. haiz. guess. iwillneverplayasinglesoloinmylife. waitaminute! gotplayedonce. well. cozKel carnplayashehavetoconductthebandwhat. haiz. btw. kawaii ishmynewbro. whaha. sokawaii. sotall. haiz. ifonlyimaguy. andicantransfertoMontfortandbewithmydidi. wait. whataboutmymeimei inChonGbOoN? whaha. then. iwillbeinlovewithher. whaha. idunneedtoomanymeimei. cozihaveoneler. buthor. onceagirl, alwaysagirl. nebbermind. stillwewillbebrothersforever. meand kawaii. and ofcourse. mydeariemei. Chicken. lovehertoomuch. aiyoh. lovemymei &didilarhh. whaha. flutelmoVI. iloveyoutoo. eventhoughyoucarnspeaktome. iwillloveyou! *slapmuhself* imbecomingsickk. btw. onemoredaytoskool. sian. yep. haiz. imall aloneathomenow. andimblogginglikenobody's bussiness. blog. blog. he ate my heart, then he ate my brain ♥
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20050313
03:29
hEy you. hmm. imstillonlineandonthecomputer. hmm. um. justnow. gotsomethingon. aboutSha&Ras. meandChickenbeevillpeopleandhurtSha. well. imthemastermindlarr. iwantedtobringthemtogether. ithinktheyreallymeantforoneanother. haiz. finallyitsover. iwenttomendakiyesterdaymorn. geez. Wanaskedifmyparentsarecoming forthemeettheparentsession. well. mymumhasgonetomsia. andidunhaveafather. sonoonewillcome. anyway. whocares? hesaidthatmyparentsdunloveme. ireallywantedtocry. imsohurt. haiz. then, triedtoapologisedbysayingthatiagoodgirl. whattheshit? ifyoudomeantohurtme, itsokiae. bysayingallthisshitties. whyshouldanyonesaythatimgood whereasidunthinkthatimthatgoodatall? sick ! haiz. i changetheblog. stillcarnforgetabouttheenglishpaper. failedbadly. ormaybeshouldisaywonderfoolly? failenglishyouwillfaileverything. well. imconfidentandtotallypositivethat iwillfaillallthesubjects. whatdoiexpect? allA1swhenidununderstand astupidenglishessay. well. letsmakethattwoessays. he ate my heart, then he ate my brain ♥
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20050312
17:15
Everytime Lyrics by Britney Spears Come notice me And take my hand So why are we Strangers when Our love is strong Why carry on without me? And everytime I try to fly I fall without my wings I feel so small I guess I need you baby And everytime I see you in my dreams I see your face, it's haunting me I guess I need you baby I make believe That you are here It's the only way I see clear What have I done You seem to move on easy And everytime I try to fly I fall without my wings I feel so small I guess I need you baby And everytime I see you in my dreams I see your face, it's haunting me I guess I need you baby I may have made it rain Please forgive me My weakness caused you pain And this song is my sorry Ohhhh At night I pray That soon your face Will fade away And everytime I try to fly I fall without my wings I feel so small I guess I need you baby And everytime I see you in my dreams I see your face, it's haunting me I guess I need you baby After all... After all... he ate my heart, then he ate my brain ♥
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20050311
20:01
Based on the poem that Lynn Jones wrote days before his death: I Am Life, Music, Competition. I like exciting things, and doing good for others. Beauty, Successfulness and Smartness are important to me. I like to achieve recognition. I can succeed if I really put my mind to it. I am very set in my ways, But I can change when I realize my ignorance. I like a simple, nonchalant lifestyle. I hate ignorance. I hate structuredness. This is me. I am! he ate my heart, then he ate my brain ♥
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19:51
hEy you.. hmm. today. imfeelingokiae. iwentforbandforlessthananhour. whatthefork? whaha. well. yesterdayireceivedtwocommontestresults. failed. englishandmalay. mrsleetalktome. gosh. iwassodespress. justnow. duringassembly. icried. idunnowhy. icarncontrolmyhands. ireallyfeelliketearing thepagesofthe10ys. ifeelsosickk. ithinkiwunpassmyemathzct. icarndo. haiz. yesterday. ialsocriedaftertalkingtomrslee. ifailedenglsih. ifeellikeitstheendoftheworld. well. itis. haiz. chickenaccompanyhermumtocentral. sogood. haiz. tmlstillgotmendaki. tmlalsomumwillbegoingtomsia. haiz. ihavetobuckupman. he ate my heart, then he ate my brain ♥
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20050309
18:55
hEy you.. hmm. todaygotbadnews. duckiecutherself. imsoworried. hopethatsheisfine. nowimthinkinghowshedidit. bunniesaycozofsomething. hmm. whytothatextent? shestillgotmeandbunnie. umm. iknowimprettyUSELESS. haiz. sosleepy. i studiedforsocialstudies. hmm. dunnoifipass. tomologotphysics. andthereisntanyhmwk. yea. and todayisBOWWOWsbday. yeah. andahlOngstoo. yesterday. hadnothinggreattosay. maybeiforgotten. ohyah. remembered. yesterdayimissedamathz. gotbandsyfrehearsal. yea. iplayedquitebadly. thehallwasreallybig. ithadalotofpaddingsonthewall. physics. yep. sotired. twodaysbeforeyesterday. whichismybday. idingettogotowhatbigboobsyouhave. haiz. well. whentofareastplaza. atethere. mealwasabouthundred+bucks. sox. yep. haiz. ireallywanntedtogo. bytheway. birdwishedmehappybelatedbday. sohappy. yea. geez. ireallysoundlike ireallyreallylikethebird. hesokiae. but. nothing. birdissosweetforwishingme happybelatedbday. yea. ihopethatduckiewillbeallright. he ate my heart, then he ate my brain ♥
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20050305
17:48
hEy you.. haiz. rejected. some1totilikeBird. ah! noway! [[u like Bird issit? ur nick sounds diff tt's y]] ifonly, heknow. sickandtiredofit. haiz. he ate my heart, then he ate my brain ♥
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11:17
hEy you.. today, idingotoMendaki. sosian. plussofar. iosodunquiteliketheteachersthere. yea. Awieisstillthere. ithinklah. shegotfriend. soshewillbeallright. haiz. todayChickengonnaaccompanyhermum toployclinic. good. ihopehermumwillbefine. andChickenhavetold herrealfeelings. yep. stillthinkingabout tomolo. iwannago. butgothim. idunwan. haiz. yesterday, ihelpedIronLadywith hisbeloved. gosh. ihelpedhimtomuch. well. ipityhimar. haiz. helovedhersomuchie. heyIronLady ifyoukeepthinking thatlifesuckstothecore, cometomeandscold ormaybeventyouranger. maybeyoucantellmeyourprob. iwillhelpyouderr. whaha. he ate my heart, then he ate my brain ♥
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20050304
23:38
hEy you.. hmm. today. gotAmathzCT. kiAez. theprevioustestigot60%. icarnbelievethatiwonEdandJohn. whataJOKE. hmm. todaysupposetohaveMalayremedial. theteacherwasreallybusywithMEETINGS. sosickman. me&sheila+firdauswaitedforherforaboutanhour. shemightaswellcancelit. wastemytimeonly. waitedforChicken. hmm. KPJcameforbandtoday. hetriedontheNEWsax. wah. hekeptprasingit. yea. heplayedsomenicesongs. heardthatsomeonelikedhimar? oh. myfirstthoughtwasright. yep. then, WeiWentoldmethatshenotgoingforthe "whatBIGboobsyouhave?" ireallywannago. butshesnotgoingandsoisChicken. plushimisgoingtoo. whyshouldigoandspoiltmybday? umm. ifigo, whataboutmum? hMm. ireallywannago. haiz. whatshouldido? he ate my heart, then he ate my brain ♥
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20050302
15:59
hEy you.. todaygotAssembly. haizz. whygothim? whydoesithavetobehim? whycarnthemchoosemewithmysenior? sosickk. hepraisehimself. haiz. then, balaarrh. he uckoutmAn. heosoactedintheskit. burt. whyshouldicare? imadeherupsetagain. iknowhowmuchuhatedhim. burt. heseverywhere. icarnhelpit. ifonlyicouldturnbacktime. yousee. imsorry. ihatemyself. he ate my heart, then he ate my brain ♥ |